Hey people who read this. 🙂 So basically, I’m an acrobat. I’m on a performance troupe at my university, and this Friday and Saturday are our HUUUGE annual show. So basically, I’m being run into the ground. (Today’s dress rehearsal took nine. Freakin’. Hours.)
SO ANYWAY. I am apologizing for how sporadic I’ve been with updates. I’m spending a lot of time in the gym and not much time with my laptop. I’LL TRY TO DO BETTER. :C
I sit here driving myself to insanity
Fretting over changing what has yet to happen
As past phantoms breathe down my neck
I lay awake to whimper helplessly
For one so close, you feel so far
Though I know pain once dulled alters the absence
I scramble to hold on to what’s already there
Weep over losing what’s never been lost
Reminded of torment once thought long fled
I decry all hold if may have over my heart
Denying that heartbreak’s cruel revenants
Revile me yet more with each step to new love
Their odious words are known false, yet ring true
Memories manipulate any scrap of dismay
Until I can’t breathe, suffocated by irrationality
I refuse to drive away what I hold dear
Though demons plague me with falsehoods
That eclipse the truth displayed to me
I want to believe that after fighting forever
Happiness has shared its blessing with me
But, locked in a chokehold of apprehension
I can’t bring myself to enjoy the treasure
Dangling in my dreams, though there alone
Leave me, memories that twist my mind
Let me to know what I’ve actually found
If gone, let it be gone, though of its own devices
For I will not allow you to use me as a tool
Against what I’ve sought for so long.
Your eyes link with mine
And your lips tug into a mischievous smirk
The same that tugs on the strings of my heart
And you speak a simple phrase
“Don’t get any ideas.”
And in that one moment
All that dominates my thoughts
All that I dream to speak
Are ideas
The idea of my hand in yours
As you laugh away any sorrows
That may plague my heart
A breaking dawn spent once again
At your side, safe and warm
One last kiss goodnight
Though neither wants to part
A shoulder to cry on
And arms to hold me
Through pain and worry
And whatever life throws at me
I know not what life may bring
But I have a few ideas.
I can’t seem to stop this world from spinning
Now my mind won’t stop racing and slipping and tripping
Soon enough, I’ll trip just a little too far
And I won’t be able to recover for the life of me
No matter how I cling to that which keeps me sane
I can’t keep this up forever, you know
Time will catch up with me and sooner or later
You will be all that keeps me going.
–x–
Also called “That Awkward Moment When Tori is Losing Her Mind Enough That She Actually Writes An Acrostic.”
It’s the moments when you smile with your eyes
That I realize why the little things are so special to me
The way you take my hand
When you think no one’s looking
The way your eyes crinkle
When I toss you a smile
The way you lay your arm across my side
When night falls and sleep takes
The way I sometimes catch you looking
When you think I’m not paying attention
The way you kiss me on the cheek
When dawn breaks and it’s time to wake
The way you hold me and whisper “Mine,”
When no one else can hear
It’s the little things like that
That remind me how glad I am
To have found you
And to call you Mine.
–x–
Some moments scream “WRITE A POEM ABOUT ME”, while other moments remind you of all the things you want to say, and sometimes it comes out in poem form.
Maybe I’m silly, maybe I’m young
And maybe I don’t know what I’m doing
But maybe I’ve fallen for you
When maybe I shouldn’t have
And maybe each word you speak
Makes me think that maybe
You’ve maybe done the same
And maybe I’m on your mind right now
And maybe you can’t figure out how
To say what’s in your heart, maybe
Whatever it may be.
–x–
Maybe, maybe, baby.
Hey, sorry I’ve been so bad about posting!! My acrobatics troupe is preparing for our HUGE annual show this weekend, and I’ve been busy as hell. So I’ll just post the poems from the last three days right now. ^^;
**Day 12’s poem is sadly one that I don’t know if I can share with the world. It’s a bit of a touchy subject for me at the moment, maybe I’ll update this one once some stuff blows over but… I’m sorry. I’ll have something new for tomorrow, I promise, but this one is going to be just for me at the moment.**
Navy brushstrokes streak the sky
With flecks of yellow tossed around
And one single spotlight that hangs above
The night obscures that which should be seen
As the dancer takes her stance
The stars whisper to each other
As the performance starts
Darkness whips around her
And the obsidian air swirls with each move
The distant planets remain in silent reverence
The owls and crickets sing their praises
She dances away her pain where she knows
No judgment will be passed
And dusk will mask her tears
And, if for this one moment alone,
She can show all that she feels
And be what nature intended for her
Knowing that her audience will, for once,
Just watch.
–x–
If you’ve never gone out and just danced in the moonlight, I highly recommend it.
I missed the way you looked at me
The jokes you’d always make
I missed the things you’d do for me
The smiles you’d throw my way
I missed your kind and loving words
Your disregard for how
The world would see the things you’d do
You only cared for now
I missed the wide and waiting arms
That held me every day
I missed the way you’d whisper close
And tell me you’d always stay
I missed this all, but that is past
For now I’ll find something to last
I’m leaving the bad, enjoying the good
I’m living love the way I should.
–x–
Another “modified” sonnet. Not as pleased with this one as some of the others, but hey. Can’t win ’em all.
loveandothertoxicemotions 